Chuckles of the Day




An elderly man goes to the doctor and tells him that he hasn’t been feeling well. The doctor examines him, leaves the room, and comes back with three different bottles of pills.

The doctor says, “Take the green pill with a big glass of water when you get up. Take the blue pill with a big glass of water after lunch. Then just before going to bed, take the red pill with another big glass of water.”

Startled to be put on so much medicine, the elderly man stammers, “My goodness, Doc. Exactly what’s my problem?”

The doctor says, “You’re not drinking enough water.”

* * * * * * *

Matt went into Doc Steven’s office for his annual checkup, and the Doc asked if there was anything unusual he should know about.

That left it pretty wide open, so he told the Doc that he found it real strange how his suit must have shrunk just sitting in his closet because it didn’t fit when he went to get ready for a wedding recently.

The Doc said, “Suits don’t shrink just sittin’ there. You probably just put on a few pounds, Matt.”

“That’s just it, Doc, I know I haven’t gained a single pound since the last time I wore it.”

“Well, then,” said Doc, “You must have a case of Furniture Disease.”

“What in the world is Furniture Disease?”

“Furniture Disease is when you reach that stage in life when your chest starts sliding down into your drawers.”




Cardiac Arrest? Someday, Drones May Come to Save You

Amy Norton wrote . . . . . . . . .

A good Samaritan can save the life of someone in cardiac arrest if a portable defibrillator is nearby. Now, a pilot study suggests a new way to get the devices into bystanders’ hands: drones.

The study, done in Sweden, found that drone delivery was a feasible way to get automated external defibrillators (AEDs) to the scene of a cardiac arrest. In fact, the drones typically beat ambulances by a couple of minutes.

Since those minutes can mean the difference between life and death, the early findings are encouraging, researchers said.

However, drone-delivered AEDs are far from prime time.

“This points to a non-traditional route for addressing a problem we’ve had for a long time,” said Dr. Jennifer Silva, a member of the American College of Cardiology’s Health Care Innovation Council.

“In general, I love the concept of using technological advances to improve the way we practice medicine,” said Silva, who was not involved in the study.

In this case, she said, the findings suggest it’s possible to deliver AEDs by drone. But the big question, Silva stressed, is whether that can ultimately make a difference in cardiac arrest victims’ outcomes.

Cardiac arrest occurs when the heart’s normal rhythm stops suddenly, making the muscle incapable of delivering blood and oxygen to the body. It causes unconsciousness within seconds and is fatal within minutes — unless a bystander performs chest compressions or uses an AED until paramedics arrive.

AEDs are portable versions of the defibrillators doctors use to “shock” the heart back into a normal rhythm. The devices automatically analyze a person’s heart rhythm to gauge whether a cardiac arrest is in progress.

“They are incredibly user-friendly,” Silva explained. “They literally talk you through the steps, and tell you when a shock should be delivered.”

AEDs are often available in public places, she noted, including schools, airports, sports venues, retail stores and office buildings.

But most cardiac arrests happen at home, where AEDs are rarely available, said Dr. Sofia Schierbeck, of Karolinska University Hospital, in Stockholm, Sweden.

That’s a particular dilemma if an ambulance cannot arrive quickly.

So Schierbeck and her colleagues wondered whether drones could step in.

In a pilot study, they had three AED-equipped drones integrated into a regional medical system covering about 80,000 people. When a suspected cardiac arrest was reported to emergency services, both an ambulance and, if possible, a drone were dispatched.

Over three months, 53 possible cardiac arrests were called in. A drone was dispatched to 12. In the other cases, drones couldn’t be sent because of weather or darkness or because the emergency struck in a “no-fly zone” — near high-rise buildings, for instance.

When a drone could be sent, the study found, it beat the ambulance 64% of the time, typically by 2 minutes.

The findings were published Aug. 27 in the European Heart Journal and presented virtually at the European Society of Cardiology’s annual meeting.

In a news release from the meeting, Schierbeck acknowledged that weather and other logistics limited the drones’ use.

But, she said, “by 2022 we should have drones capable of flying in darkness and in moderate rain. Longer battery life could increase the flight range and the number of inhabitants covered by one drone.”

An editorial published with the study points out another issue: None of the AEDs delivered by the drones were actually used by bystanders.

“We also need to work on educating bystanders regarding AED use,” wrote Dr. Nicole Karam and colleagues at the University of Paris, in France.

Silva agreed that the study leaves open the crucial issue of what happens after the AED arrives. The “chain of survival,” she said, has to include lay people ready and willing to use the device.

“Drones can deliver an AED, which is all well and good,” Silva said. “But we need to know how it impacts patient care.”

According to Karam’s team, one possible solution is to have emergency dispatchers stay on the phone with bystanders as the AED arrives. Another, they say, is to take advantage of existing smartphone apps that alert people who are trained in CPR of a nearby cardiac arrest. Those alerts could also tell users that an AED is being delivered to the scene.

For now, Silva said people can learn more about responding to cardiac arrest through the American Heart Association’s website and others like it, or through classes (often free) at a local hospital.

Source: HealthDay

Bone-in Salisbury Steak with Tater Tots and Cherry Ketchup

Ingredients

1 large or 2 medium russet potatoes, peeled
1 large egg white
1 teaspoon ground nutmeg
Kosher salt and freshly ground black pepper
3/4 cup ketchup
3/4 cup sour cherry jam or preserves
dash of Worcestershire sauce
4 ounces ground chuck
4 ounces ground brisket
4 ounces ground short rib beef (if you can’t find this, increase the amounts of chuck and brisket by 2 ounces each)
1 piece caul fat, about the size of a large baking sheet (see Note)
2 rib eye bones, cleaned (ask the butcher)
vegetable oil, for frying
2 to 3 tablespoons chopped fresh flat-leaf parsley
2 tablespoons unsalted butter (I like to use clarified butter)
1 clove garlic, finely chopped
1 sprig fresh rosemary, leaves chopped
1 sprig fresh thyme, leaves chopped

Method

  1. Using a box grater or the grater of a food processor, grate the potato. Put the grated potato in a bowl and mix with the egg white, nutmeg, and salt and pepper. Lay a sheet of plastic wrap on the work surface and scrape the potato mixture into the center. Roll the potato mixture into a cylinder, using the plastic wrap as a guide. Freeze for at least 2 hours and up to 12 hours or overnight.
  2. In a small bowl, stir the ketchup with the jam. Add the Worcestershire sauce and stir well. Set aside.
  3. In a mixing bowl, use your hands to mix together the chuck, brisket, and short rib meat. Season the meat with salt and pepper and form into a 12-ounce patty. Lay the caul fat on the work surface and put the patty in the center. Position the bones next to the meat and wrap it tightly in the caul fat.
  4. Pour the oil into a deep skillet to a depth of 2 to 3 inches. Heat over medium-high heat until the oil registers 360°F on a deep-frying thermometer.
  5. Unwrap the potato cylinder and cut the frozen mixture into disks, each about 1/2 inch thick.
  6. When the oil is hot, add the still frozen or barely thawed tater tots and fry, turning once, until golden brown, 2 to 3 minutes; do not crowd the pan, and let the oil regain its temperature between batches. Drain the tots on paper towels. Transfer to a bowl and toss the hot tots with salt and the parsley.
  7. In a large skillet (I recommend a cast-iron skillet), melt the butter over medium-high heat. Add the garlic, rosemary, and thyme and then cook the patty for 3 to 4 minutes on each side for medium-rare.
  8. Unwrap the patty from the caul fat and remove the bones. Serve with the tater tots and pass the ketchup on the side.

Note

Don’t let caul fat scare you. It’s lightweight and easy to work with, sold in sheets from high-end butchers and online. It is the fat that surrounds the internal organs of the steer (and other animals). It’s also called lace or netting fat because of its webbed pattern. Because it’s thin and relatively light, it’s often used for sausage casing and to cover pates. Sorry to say, there is no substitute for it—so this is the exception to my rule of supplying alternatives for hard-to-find ingredients.

Makes 2 servings.

Source: So Good


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